#137 Not That Bad

 Not That Bad: Dispatches from Rape Culture by Roxanne Gay

Not That Bad is such a deeply important read, its so underrated and something i rarely see on bookstagram or booktube which is such a shame. The book is an anthology of essays written by a different author and covers an array of topics surrounding rape culture. Rape culture can be such a triggering and difficult topic for so many but i feel like so much can be learned from this book and that although parts of it can be triggering and upsetting it is such an important read. This book does not shy away from the hardest parts of rape culture to be delved into, it is very emotional and heavy in certain parts. 

I really admire Roxanne Gay for putting these stories together, they arent a fun read or even pleasant to read in certain circumstances but each and every story deserves our attention and deserves to be heard regardless of the subject matter surrounding it. These things happen every single day and it shouldnt be taboo to speak about it. The statistics are correct that 4/5's of young men and women in the UK have been sexually harrassed never mind assaulted so we shouldnt be turning a blind eye in order to live in blissful ignorance in my opinion. 

I listened to these essays on audiobook and it was even more powerful than reading it physically. It was told wonderfuuly by 3 different narrators and it really gave life to each story. It really gave each story a spotlight as these arent stories we hear everyday and we certainly dont get the point of view from the victim and how it affected them. I found it to be uplifting and empowering overall. The diversity, subject matter and scope within these essays is what makes it so unique, every other non fiction book ive read that covers topics such as feminism or rape culture is usually written by and for white women but this covered so many different people with different circumstances and what i loved was that it included the male voice and this isnt just something that affects women and that is so often forgotten about. It also included voices from the LGBTQ+ community which was so good to see and read as some of those groups are already so oppressed and it was nice to hear a different point of view from that of the white, middle class woman. 

The topics covered within this anthology range from cat calling to sexual assault even covering topics such as sexual abuse against children. We get to see so many different points of view but it all summarises how much of a problem rape culture still is within society and how we need to do better and educate. Educate our daughters, our sons, our family and our friends. 

The over arching topic of things being .not that bad' was so poignant throughout. No one has the right to judge some one elses story, what happened to them or how it made them feel and they certainly dont have the right to make it out like it was less than it was. It actually gave me myself a lot to think about when im having banter with friends not specifically about rape culture but more general things such as a disappointment, illness or even something like a fall and how that might actually make them feel deep down and how its not my place to judge the situation. It also made me think about how i will teach my young daughter to behave and how to better educate herself against rape culture. All in all one of the most important non fiction books ive ever read.